Sleeping in a field of complacency

In my day-to-day experience of employment at a small market research firm which I shall keep nameless, I see people of all shapes, sizes, nationalities and educational backgrounds, who seem content in mediocrity and displacement. They are not happy with where they are, but they are not compelled to move forward or change.

It reminds me of a Woody Allen movie where he talks about change. It doesn’t remind of the specific quote*1, as I cannot for the life of me remember it and a Google search proved fruitless. But yes, in a nutshell he said that change is terrifying and to avoid it at all costs because only bad things will eventuate *2.

The epitome of wisdom

Now if this is the life philosophy my fellow comrades have adopted, I feel they are missing certain elements of truth in this statement:

1) He was [partially] joking.
2) He was referring to the little changes that arise each day that serve as clogs in our daily habitual life-style, and does admit in a book of his (actually a book of interviews with him called…?) that sometimes the BIG changes are necessary.

One of my favourite movies is Vanilla Sky (2001).

Yes. I know, please don’t repeat the predictable, I just don’t care.

Watch it [again]. I dare you.

Right at the end of the film Tommy repeats a line previously uttered by Penny earlier –

“Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around.”

Now in the context of Vanilla Sky, Tom was about to leap off a 50-storey building into the real world as he had been in a dream state for a hundred years, and obviously this won’t be happening to you anytime soon, but the specific point remains.

Our lives are not determined. Our feet are not locked in cement. But every day I see people who seem willing to plant their lives in the field of complacency, and even worse, these same people telling me I should be doing the same.

And I say - “NO SIR, I SHALL NOT!”

Whether or not anyone else gives a rats ass about my fate is ultimately meaningless, because I am the only predetermined factor of my future existence, and if I listen to THEM I will no longer be myself, I will be THEM and that is more terrifying than the black abyss of The Unknown.

Now I realize that the lame metaphors have been piled on a little too thick, but they helped me formulate my thoughts into some kind of discernible logic so I don’t care!

My friend Chris used to always say (and probably still does) that life’s a comedy, you gotta laugh. And I couldn’t agree more. As much as it may seem that I take myself much too seriously, I honestly don’t (I swear), I simply feel the extreme urge to follow my gut, and cannot relate to anyone who acts otherwise. If life is short why are we all so freakin' negative?

We are SCARED. (hence my previous post regarding the noughties)

Joe Vs. The Volcano (1990)

Watch it if you feel like breaking out of your shell

*1 don’t you just hate those people who can remember every Woody Allen and Simpsons quotes word for word. Although if someone repeats another Family Guy line for me I may just bitch-slap them to death.

*2 I just realized while finishing this post that there perhaps is no Woody Allen quote about change, except for this one: “I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.” Here here.

The Nougties In Film PART 1

Is that even how you spell noughties? My spell check certainly doesn't think so.

Anywho, this post is the first of I don't know how many that deals with how film is being defined this century - which I just realized is coming to a close. G-diddy damn, only a year and a half left and then we're in the teenies and I'm turning 25.

Terrifying.

We are in a scary time. Hope is a figment of our imaginations. There is no light at the end of the tunnel. All is NOT good in the world. Good can't always defeat evil. We are powerless against oppression. And yes, we are all terrified.

And if you're wondering what brought this all on, I have three words that should be very familiar to you by now.

The...



...dark...



...knight.

If you have not seen this [very slightly flawed] masterpiece, get off your fat butt right now and skedaddle to your nearest theater pronto. There may even be a ticket left for you. I won't repeat what countless reviews have already articulated, except to say that darkness is imbedded within this Batman film, and it is here to stay. Batman is no longer Gotham's hero. He is the outcast, and we love him for it, even if Gotham's citizens don't. And while we impatiently wait for the third film to deal with the moral quandary left in the Joker and the Great Heath Ledger's wake, let us consider what this film means to us and to film in general.

The main point at hand to remember is that Christopher Nolan's film is not arthouse, but a mainstream Hollywood blockbuster, that nonetheless is able to tackle themes that are usually more at home in a Coen Brothers noir film. And even that film won the Oscar.

Badness and evil are the new hip. It is "in" because we as a society can no longer deny its ungodly presence everywhere we go.

There is a pivotal moment in the film involving 2 ferries, and I won't go into further details just to say that WHAT HAPPENS here has been one of the few things in the film that left some people cold. They think it seemed like a stretch, because what happens presumes that mankind as a whole is good and unselfish.

People I have discussed the film with say that this moment, or CHOICE, was unrealistic, and "Hollywood". What they really mean to say is that it was not credible.

They didn't buy it. Mankind ISN'T good. We're NOT selfless.

Are we all pawns of madmen like The Joker?

Does evil ultimately triumph?

Does fear reign supreme?

All to be discussed in parts 2, 3 and beyond...

Rip Heath Ledger.

A wonderous actor in two of my favourite films of the noughties.

But yes, neither the most hopeful or positive experiences (which is not say that Brokeback isn't

transcendantly inspiring and thought provoking, just that it's final message is a bit depressing for everyone).

Why is the world always bringing us down?

I deleted all content of this post out of personal shame.

I need a thicker coat of skin.

Thank you Lloyd Dobler.

lame lame lame lame lame

"The Living Futures" is a terrible title.

My film is now called "Kely".

That's it. One L intentional. Less pretentious and doesn't sound like a cheesy soap opera.

Perhaps...

Right now I am encoding into an MPG2 file the 549th version of my currently untitled feature film that is perhaps called:

THE LIVING FUTURES

Perhaps...is that title not totally lame? I just don't know any more. I wish it was the right title so the whole thought process could be pushed aside. It hurts my brain.

Here is a synopsis I wrote a while back, not sure if it fully sums up the film:

Returning after two years in exile, Cordelia Holt is dragged back into the seedy Australian underbelly of both her father, and former lover, Pierson Stikes. After a series of unavoidable and inexplicable consequences, the only question that remains is - why? And the answer to that does not lie in Cordelia's future. It is in her past.

I realized while typing this that my main character is Pierson, not Cordelia, so this synopsis makes little sense. Oh well.

Anywho, the film goes backwards and then backwards again and all is eventually revealed (it's not as lame as it sounds [I hope]).

So as I am sitting at my computer - which has given me turmoil after turmoil for 9 months I might add - I am adjusting to the fact that this film might nearly be finished.

Only 17 months and 6 days later!

My favourite film about [low-budget] filmmaking. So painful and true! Aaaaagh!!!!!
Although for the purposes of this blog I'm sure I'll be able to scrounge up a hundred more

movies about the same thing as a point of reference. And once again I am a generic hack...

But then I start thinking about this, and all that comes into my head is the realization that no matter how hard I try, or how much effort I put into this beast, I will ultimately dissatisfy a lot of people.

FOR EXAMPLE: I showed my housemate and friend, who is also IN the film as a major character, and after viewing it she requested to be disowned from the film.

Lovely.

She said it was "confusing". It's supposed to be confusing! Yes yes she has a point perhaps it is TOO confusing but when you talk through the entire movie how are you possibly going to realize there is a plot twist coming?

And THEN it hit me. When someone sits down to watch your movie that you have shed blood and sweat for years over, they don't care that it's your baby. They don't care that it's your passion. They care that you're taking up 93 minutes of your life and goddamit you better earn it!

And I guess they have a point. Who am I to take those 93 minutes away from anybody? Do I deserve those 93 minutes? Will I use those 93 minutes well? Or will that person I am placing inside temporary arrested development walk away either

a) Having wasted their 93 minutes when they could have been eating, sleeping, or watching a good movie?
b) Detracted from their overall life and sense of well being, convincing them that having a dream and passion [ie. me] is not enough to ensure success, fame, fortune, and most of all talent.

This is a poster idea I had, obviously not finished...
shall post more pics and maybe vids when I can.

My rant will finish now to continue another day. My aim is to make a post about my film only every 3 posts, that way I am not TOO monotonous or self-loathing.

If anyone ever reads this and has some interesting experiences or thoughts to share, please help wound my bleeding heart. Otherwise my housemate might get to it first.

utterly random movie of the week #1

The Boost ('88)

Do you want to know one of the world's Best Kept Secrets?

James Woods is "The Man". Inverted commas and Captial letters are intentional and required.

De Niro, Pacino, Hoffman, Woods. I am not joking.

Whilst Woods never received the level of acclaim of those other guys, he is in the same class.

Woods always brings something new to the table. And something that only HE could bring. His performances are filled with energy, passion and surprise. I never know what expect from him. Have you seen Once Upon A Time In America? His performance is the stand out. Yes, over De Niro's.

That he struggles to get the same class of roles in his later years is a darn shame, as he is an actor I dearly miss from the screen. I have not watched his show Shark (I don't think it has aired on Australian TV), but I'm sure it is a cut above the normal fare due to his presence alone.

And here we have The Boost, a little known film from Sea of Love director Harold Becker, about the downward spiral of a man addicted to excess. Sean Young plays his loyal to a fault wife, and you know what? Even when Woods' character is acting like a complete dope we STILL understand why she sticks by him. Lenny (Woods) is a shonkster salesman selling tax schemes across Los Angeles for oodles of money, until a tax law is changed and he hits rock bottom, replacing the rush of success with the rush of cocaine.

What happens next is a virtuoso display of the effects of drug addiction. There is a scene where Lenny and his wife take 2 potential investors out for dinner, and Lenny cannot secure the table he requested the night before, and he basically freaks out on coke, and what we are seeing is not just an actor given an excuse to be the fool, but a deeply flawed man venting out his insecurities on everyone but himself.

What else can I say? Seek it out. Would make a good double feature with Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas ('97)

utterly random movie of the week

Every week I watch about 10 movies on average. Some old, some new. And just then I decided that every week I will snap up one of those movies, probably either my favourite, or even better my most hated, and I will offer my own mere thoughts on it.

Tonight I am watching James Woods in The Boost ('88) so I will kick the ball rolling soon...

another farkin' list

Being a writer is terrifying.

Why?

1) Most people don’t care.

2) You make no money from it. Well, at least I don't...

3) You need to work a crappy non-writer-like job to pay the bills (more on this in a future post).

4) Most people don’t care PLUS hate whatever you write.

5) You spend way too much time feeling sorry for yourself.

6) You are generally alone. Physically, metaphorically, and existentially.

7) You have to resort to posting on blogs to make yourself feel better, and then you realize that STILL nobody cares.

8) Part 7 but whilst writing on your blog you begin to acknowledge the fact that not only are you poor, miserable, alone, and self-loathing, you are also a cliché, and that there are thousands - wait, make that MILLIONS - of people out there who have exactly the same thoughts as you do, at exactly the same time, and that this will inevitably show up in your generic script or film you churn out after years of torment and heartache.

9) You write lists that nobody will read.

Goodbye for now.

is anybody out there?

...and I don't simply mean in the blogger sense.

Well, I probably do, but I could stretch myself to mean some existential form of communication. All types of meaningful contact between human souls.

But yes, for the sake of specificity let's stick with Dreams of a Nobody and the "Zero Traffic Situation".

Over at Seth's Blog he discusses how to increase traffic. Hell, ANY traffic, as right now I am technically communicating to myself. And I'm not short of help, there's Associated Content, ProBlogger, Lorelle on Wordpress, and eKstreme all helping the general public to increase blog awareness, and that's only through a quick Google search.

But you tell me, my new invisible friends - how do I reach out there and speak to the public?

Here I am, Joe Schmo, 5 years late to the party, wanting instant fame and fortune as an internet blogger. What do I do?

Have something interesting to say perhaps? I'll work on that.

Visit other people's blogs and comment? Mustn't be selfish I suppose. Can anyone provide me some useful links to other similar/drastically different blogs?

Write short, pithy posts? This one is dragging on a bit.

Be anonymous? Hell, I'm a Nobody.

In short, this post is about nothing except my inherent impatience and desire to be heard. It has no real point, or ultimate worth, and therefore serves to conflict with the purpose of the post, which is to increase traffic to this blog.

So I'll stop whining now, and next post I'll be funny/witty/interesting/original/provocative and/or hip.

I promise.

Honest to blog! not another one...

The age of technology will destroy us all. Just ask James Cameron. But fear it or not, we cannot escape it.



In the 21st century we are all linked and bound by binary codes and our inner yearning for 15 minutes of fame.

And now it is my time

After 23 long and painful years outside of the limelight, hiding in the darkest corners of libraries and public bathrooms, I am here to scream out:

"HEY WORLD. I EXIST!!!"

Who am I talking to here?



Today myself, tomorrow the world. And they will be uproarious in enthusiasm, with multitudes of marriage proposals and book deals, and a movie of the week starring Brian Austin Green as myself.

And who can I thank for my soon-to-be-found fame?

One stripper with a penchant for goth clothing and making up absurd catch phrases.

Hint: Oscar winner. Second hint: Hamburger phone.

Yes, that's right friends. The coolest chick since Ellen Page is a trend-setter, a rule-breaker.

A success.

And goddamn are we jealous of you. So we'll mock your wicked ways. Say you're a one hit wonder [and ignore Jennifer's Body and Megan's Boobs], and toss our 90's hamburger phones in the bin with our tobacco pipes and second-hand furniture sets.

But don't listen to our harsh words, and do ignore our slanted eyes.

We would be you too. In the blink of an eye.

And let's be honest here, we are doing our best to be you already. All 3 million of us. Heck, if we don't have a blog we have a screenplay hidden in our third drawer about our lives, loves, and fears.

So thank you Diablo Cody for exposing society's urge to be heard. We owe you our lives.

Well, our new ones at least.

Wizard.

a new beginning? or just the same end?

Right now it is 3:21 in bright sunny Sydney Australia.

In ten minutes it will be 3:31 in dreary raining Sydney Australia.

Life is about change, I might as well get used to it.

Here is my shameless attempt to gain notoriety, whilst being nothing but a resentful spiteful hateful self-loathing world-loathing cliche'.

I am on post-production on my first feature film currently entitled "Living Consequences", or perhaps "Futures" (what do you think?). Now that you know this I will never let you forget it.

This goddamn crazy lil' film has been my life for 14 months and 5 days, we've been through the good and the bad, more of the latter and more to come.

Because here's the truth: I'm scared s**tless that it sucks balls. Some lame Tarantino/Nolan/Rodriguez ripoff that makes no sense and never will, with piss-poor production qualities and shlocky Tara Reid-style acting.

It keeps me up at night that I will be the only one that ever cares about the 96 minutes it takes to view this film.

I don't have prospects beyond my dreams. I'm not friends with a Hollywood agent, or the cousin of a nephew of Martin Scorsese. Gee, Tara Reid wouldn't even give me the time of day.

I'm a Nobody With A Dream.



And right now that's it. That's all I've got.